If you’ve been married for more than a couple of years, you’ve probably had to deal with some irrational thinking on the part of your spouse. You may have even suffered through some delusionary behavior and wondered if your spouse is having a double life. If you’ve ever had these thoughts, there are warning signs that you should take note of.
We may think we know our partners, but all of us can easily fall into the trap of ignoring or simply not seeing the hints that our partner is hiding another female. Bad behavior in a marriage is often more than just one or two isolated incidents, and if you are committed to saving your marriage, you have to take these warning signs seriously.
He never enjoys spending time with you
To illustrate how your husband may separate your marriage from another woman, one indication might be that he is always busy. A woman’s suspicion may be raised when her husband is always busy. While in a marriage it’s still natural to look for activities that don’t involve work though. However, if your spouse is constantly busy with work and has no free time at all, this could be because he has another woman in his life. It’s impossible to fault a person for working. But if he is always “too busy” with work excuses and doesn’t have time for you, he might be leading a secret relationship. double.
He frequently vanishes or travels
Anyone who works in a career that demands a lot of mobility, such as an aircraft mechanic, salesperson, or cab driver, should not be assumed to be leading a double lifestyle. Someone in a position with a high leadership opportunity may not be trustworthy; watch out for duplicity! If a person has a high-pressure job, there is a higher chance of that person being untrustworthy.
If the person always arrives at the same time each day when they are away, and if you try to change their routine, they most likely are trying to preempt your call because they are busy traveling. You need to be willing to deal with this type of suspicious behavior and be willing to call his cell phone before taking off for the day.
He mistakes you for another person
This is another important thing you need to look at. It can help you spot someone’s secret relationship when they’re constantly mixing up details. That happens when they say that they went somewhere or did something that you never actually went to. “In some ways, it’s quite similar to being dishonest when you say that you went somewhere but didn’t actually go,” said Dr. Newport.
They’re mixing you up with somebody’s woman they snatched, this is a sign that your husband or boyfriend has another girlfriend. It might seem harmless at first, but this is a very telltale sign that they’re not telling the truth.
Unethical conduct
All of their spending is usually cash, and they never let you see their bank statements. They keep track of every penny they spend, and they don’t want you to see that. Remember your partner knows exactly what he’s doing! If you eventually come nearer to reality, your spouse may attempt to deceive you by using a technique known as gaslighting.
For example, if you begin to doubt their loyalty to you, they may counterattack by provoking you to sound insane for even considering it. They may also use a psychological technique known as “denial of chance”, by insisting that something cannot happen unless it is physically approved.
He is a secret keeper
The moment you notice that they’re not being as open with you, they are probably living two lives. Other warning signals include concealment, locking phones, laptops, and messages, and concealing shared financial information on the fact that you have shared accounts. If he’s already hiding something from you, then he’s probably doing the same with other people.
This is because he does not want you to see messages from the other woman/man they are dating and the fact that he is secretly planning his future with another woman, but he’s too good at acting as a conversationalist to let it slip.
No more intimacy
You know a guy is hiding a mistress when he “loses interest” in you sexually. He may start with small things, like not kissing or holding hands, and it will eventually escalate to outright ignoring you sexually. You will come to realize that your husband is emotionally unavailable during your sex time. Instead of telling you about it, he’ll divert the conversation to other topics, like paying your bills or something else that may seem insignificant. Before long, you’ll start missing out on the intimacy in your relationship when you realize that your husband is “shacking up” with another woman.
In a relationship where you both love each other and are committed to being together, you want to be emotionally close, and physically intimate, at least some for some time. If he is showing you this, he is committed to you, but it’s his desire not to be intimate that you should watch out for.
He keeps his phone hidden from you
The sense of comfort and security that comes with the end of a long day is something that many people love. You know who you are, too: you’re the person who goes straight for your phone as soon as you get home. Sure, it’s important to have some privacy in marriage, but if your husband is carrying his phone around with him at all times there could be something in there he doesn’t want you to see.
If your companion is culpable of both, locking apps and hiding his phone, he is most likely concealing information from you, and it is past time for you to begin paying closer heed to whatever is going on beside you as well as for your human existence.
Final thought
A few signs that you might be in a toxic relationship are if you feel like you’re living a double life, have some things to hide, and are ashamed of certain aspects of your partnership. A healthy relationship provides a foundation of understanding and support, without barriers of unequal power.
If you have any concerns about your relationship, it’s important to talk about them, no matter how uncomfortable they make you. But if you’re willing to confront the issues in your marriage, you might be pleasantly surprised.
There are obvious hints that somebody may be leading a dual life in which you can deliberately watch before attempting to prove their guilt, though.